WE DID IT – American Refugees


We made it to Spain intact — 2 humans, 3 dogs, 2 cats and 14 suitcases — in the middle of a pandemic. The Spanish Customs officials seemed to be waiting for Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie to show up, with us as their faceless retinue.

Some have called us crazy. This self-projection, this shadow-revealing, ad-hominem attack, falls on our deaf ears. Sorry, rabid patriots, look in the mirror. Your madness clearly engulfs us, with so many of our family, friends, acquaintances and business associates in clear denial of historical context for what is happening in the once-admirable USA. It seems to me, honestly, that the entire country is either confused or mentally ill, poisoned by division, hatred, ignorance, confusion, and emotional violence. For years, I’ve felt like a bodhisattva baking in a hell realm. Ain’t much you can do when your whole country is sick and you have no clout as a lone voice in the wilderness. If nobody is listening, well, then, one must act (relatively) alone to preserve health, mental well-being, relationships and capitial. We meditate upon your recovery from afar.

The only option I saw was escape, at least until after elections and their aftermath. We do not have the resources to be trapped in an anti-gay, anti-immigrant, anti-liberal cauldron of misinformation, misdirections, obfuscations, and confusion. The scariest thing, to me, was so-called Christians promoting evil as doctrine. Talk about The Upside Down.

It seems like a miracle that we made it so far, and it sorta was. There are many who have our eternal gratitude, and I will list them at some point. But it was also the result of a hella-lotta research, planning, hard work, project management, and heart-pounding stress. Most essentially, to pull off the amount of luggage and animals we brought, we needed a great deal of help from friends, including one friend in particular, Sunny, who went so far beyond any reasonable person’s friend-limits that she deserves to be a beneficiary in our wills.

We got this far, but we’re not by any means out of the woods yet. We are still in quarantine, just now coming out of our jet lag on day 6. There are stories to tell. Lessons we have learned. Every time I called my sister to cry or vent or to share some unbelievable happening, she told me that we should be filming our journey as YouTube special. If only there had been time for this, it would surely have provided amusement and hours of great entertainment to people in lockdown back home. But alas, we did not have time. Though our planning began years before, the crunch we experienced in the final month, the final week, and the final days before our departure nearly, literally, killed us with stress.

I’ve never taking so many sedatives in my life. Prescription Lorazapam and Clonazapam. Quasi-legal cross-border-over-the-counter diazapam, one of the perks of living 10 miles from the Mexican border. Yes, there was Emergen-c and Zinc and ethyl alcohol and masks galore, as well as my personal tequila-shot nuclear option, after faced with high-exposure COVID scenarios, for example, after shopping at Costco in the Chula Vista Mega Contagion Zone. But alcohol was for clearing out the bugs. It was no match for the stress. I admit that I sank so low as to pop my dog’s Tramadol pills to stop the palpitations. And this coming from someone who never uses narcotics. I don’t like them. But along with the daily aspirin, I had no shame in trying to stop a heart-attack. In the last month before we left, it was constant heart palpitations and anxiety attacks. This was the hardest and most high-stakes project I ever tried to pull-off, for the survival and well-being of my family.

And we did it. We are slowly recovering. Getting our health back. Moving around outside, actually walking around, moving the bodies, for the first time in nearly 6 months of shut-in-level quarantine in Southern California.

So now, from the other side of the journey, as we peer into uncertainty and an unforseeable future in a foreign town that we’d never been to before, in a country we barely know, I begin my Captain’s Log. Hopefully, our tales with inform and amuse you, and for anyone planning to undertake emigration, I hope to spare you some of our pain and learning curve.

Things are changing by the minute — the news regarding the rules of emigration are changing — you’re going to have to juggle an ecosystem of constantly evolving rules and changes with downstream impacts.

I would not recommend our level of migration to anyone not extremely well-versed in project management, or at least organized to David-Sedaris-Level of anally retentitve organization habits and documentation managment.

Disfruten, y hasta pronto!

Be sure to subscribe for updates! Share with your friends! We’d like to build a following for enquiring minds considering exit from US Madness.

Ciao for now, American compadres. We watch the election and other news from our homeland with great angst and anticipation, hoping for sanity to prevail.

Captain Eva, over and out, Sitges 22.10.20

Okay, Sarah Connor…


What Is Most Important Is Toilet Paper

What is most essential is — the anal chakra.

It seems to me that the what the whole ‘normal’ world is feeling now is what I have been feeling since I was at least three years old.  It’s nuts. A mad pandemic. Of a nasty freakin’ Flu. Not even Ebola.

Welcome to my world, my consciousness, my day-to-day reality of mind.  The only difference between us is that the reason for your angst is visible to the rest of the materially-oriented world. Now, it is. Now that there’s a visible pandemic. As opposed to the pandemic of lost attention and other issues that have been plaguing us as long as I can remember.

Those of us who are psychic have been feeling this angst for a long while. A different kind of pandemic, much worse than the Spanish Flu or the current financial predicaments forecast. Imagine that.

Live through this flu thing. Through this crazy, economic wildcard. Find your way, your purpose, your faith, your reality, your money. Go ahead. Try it. Grow up, stop hoarding, stop sniveling,  find a truly useful and healthy way to earn a living, and wonder a bit about those of us who felt the illness the whole of our lives, and are still clinging, decades and painful decades, half a century of this anguish, later. Still trying to maintain a shred of integrity, of dignity, of sanity, through the madness of a world unhinged.

Isn’t it time to think about what’s really important? Death is not the worst thing that can happen to a person. Not by a long shot. Call me a Karen, ’cause I’m not a Boomer, but better yet, call me Sarah Connor, because I’m ready, and it’s not due to hoarding. I’m a badass, because I’m still alive and thriving in some semblance of style and confidence, and damn the invisible torpedoes that the rest of the sleeping world can FINALLY see.

And, by the way, after standing in line for 10 minutes at Costco for toilet paper 40 minutes before opening, as the photo above shows, I chose to leave and trust the same force that has kept me together for so long, for my needs.

After all, there is always the Japanese portable bidet. Or, ‘smooth stones’, like I heard on the radio. I find it so interesting that of all the things people could be hoarding (antibiotics, cough medicines, seeds, pet food, photos of loved ones,) the thing that humanity seems most worried about is how to wipe its own ass.

Maybe it’s a message from God that Somebody has been Consuming more than Nature is willing to abide, or provide for.

Normally I wouldn’t post this, but nobody reads what I fucking write so fucking hell. What’s the point anyway. If even my nearest dearest can’t be bothered to read a five minute blog post, what hope is there that anyone will read an entire book by me, which is what I’ve hinged my whole will to live on? (I only say this freely because I’m not going to tell them about this post, ergo, no guilt.) I send my occasional blog posts to my siblings, my closest friends, my spouse. Each and every one of these dear ones, bless their hearts, says, ‘I’m busy right now, but I promise to read it tomorrow!’

And surprise! They never (or rarely, to be fair) do, except on pain of embarrassment by followup. Oh, the bane of scattered attention. Of attention less available than toilet paper, than water, than anything that matters.  The curse of the modern world, of no attention available for what is important. There is only enough attention for that which we ABSOLUTELY, ON PAIN OF SEVERE PAIN, MUST  pay attention to.

Attention. Nothing is more important. It has never been more important than it is now. Do you see how your attention is being manipulated? Do you have the ability to control your own attention? Do you even know what you would apply it to, if you could choose?

I love you anyway. I understand. It’s not easy to see and mitigate that which conditions us.

The only exception is my dearest spiritual friend, Darlene. I love you Darlene. May you find enough toilet paper to fulfill your needs eternally, and all the rest too. Same for everyone else, even if you can’t find the time to do what is most important for the well-being of your beloveds.

Be well.


Pillars Of Creation - Hubble Space Telescope, 1995In a Beginning, God is born.  Has It lived before? Did it emerge from a Black Hole in a parallel universe? This is unknown.

In this universe, God’s holy substance explodes into being, an ineffable fireball of pure energy, appearing from nothing, spinning, expanding. Its sphere of Existence grows to the size of a marble, a planet, a star. Ina a trillionth of a second after Its holy birth, the Deity is eightfold the size of our own Earth’s solar system — which will not exist for another 9 billion years.

I am, thinks God, whirling and growing round Its center-point. I am One, the Only, yet I am destined to become the Many.

But how can One become more? How can more become Many?

God spins, and imagines division. It fashions Its Self a body by bearing down to densify Its pure mind-energy into particles. It subdivides these into opposites of matter and antimatter. The idea works, but only for a moment; the two opposing particles duel, as God intends, but then they obliterate each other, reducing themselves down again to only pure energy. 

Still Only One. 

God is still growing, yes, but Its monotonous condition does not please It. God then experiences Its first emotion — disappointment. Though less than a billionth of a second has passed since Its birth, time feels slow at the beginning, and baby God has failed to fulfill Its first desire — to create and embody the Many within Itself. 

It remains One Alone, pure energy, dark and formless, with neither tension nor variance. It is unbearable.

Let there be imbalance! God roars in Its mind, creating the opposing particles anew. 

This time, God makes one less speck of antimatter, for the imbalance.

It works. The opposing particles battle but remain intact through their asymmetry. Now a millionth of a second old, God smiles with satisfaction. Hot particles collide, break apart, and spray out in even smaller bits. To God’s delight, Its Smile creates a new form of matter — a superheated, viscous fluid, with particles vibrating so rapidly that there is no friction at all. God’s new, liquid body flows freely, sticking to nothing, still murky and dark, but wrought with enchanting turmoil, permeated with subatomic particles smashing into each other, creating more and more excitement.

In the next three minutes, God’s new Mind-Body, now suffused with both pure energy and stable matter, cools sufficiently for protons and neutrons to bond. A proto-element forms — a hydrogen atom. But the excited electron particles, which move too swiftly to bond with the proto-atoms, create a dense fog as they flit about God’s Body, blocking light from escape. Nevertheless, this glorious form, now an opus of movement, collisions, attachments, rejections and differentiation, is immensely pleasing to the infant Diety. It remains entertained with the dance of matter and energy, and its viscous displays, for the next 380,000 years.

By then, the Diety has expanded to the size of a galaxy. Its grown bored again with Its Self. Its body has cooled sufficiently to slow the manic electrons, and Its matter has spread across the extent of the universe-body in a pleasing, uneven density. This asymmetry, this lack of uniformity, creates tension. It is good. Very good.

Then, God has another delicious thought. 

Let there be Light!  

Protons grab the calming electrons, binding them into the first true atoms of hydrogen gas. With fewer electrons in the cosmic soup between atoms, God’s body thus becomes transparent, clear. Light hurtles out in all directions in glorious, blinding flashes. When God smiles again, deep cracks of matter appear in Its uneven spread of Creation.

Light is fun! The light show amuses God, for another 200 million years.

Of note, until now, the only sound that God perceives is the repetitive, sizzling, static hum of atomic collisions and spinning spheres.

By the time 500 million years have elapsed, God has learned the extent and powers of Its holy form. It flexes, contracting the muscle of the denser matter of Its Being, condensing the new gaseous elements into clouds. Meanwhile, It relaxes where the gaps of empty space appear, which expand their area between the clouds and clumps of gas and particulate matter. 

God has discovered Its gravity, and how to use it to create the Many.

Like a weaver pulling on invisible filaments of silk, God tugs them taut, and the high-density regions, the swirling clouds of hydrogen and their fellow particulates, collapse along these invisible threads like beads on a cosmic web. The great filaments accrete great, glowing globs of condensing matter. Though this process consumes millions of years, time feels quicker now. The hydrogen gas, which has clumped together and heated up, begins to fuse, releasing energy. Along the filaments, galactic and super galactic disks and clusters form, while the space grows to vast voids between them. The galactic gas clouds begin to burn, and suddenly God witnesses the birth of Its very first star. Like God before it, the star explodes into life, creating byproducts of new elements of matter in its holy, spinning crucible. Atoms of helium, carbon, magnesium, neon, calcium, silicon and iron are born.

Oh, Glory! Witness the holy, burning body of light! A factory of Life, like Me, another, smaller body, fit to inhabit!

And now, for the first time since Its birth, God sees the way to realize Its desire, a way for the One to become the Many. Throughout the universe of God’s ever-expanding universe-body, hydrogen clouds ignite, and fireworks of stars explode into chain reactions of light, and of sound.

Oh, holy sound. And so God places Its holy Awareness inside each one of a trillion stars.

The One has become the Many.

It is a relatively-short while later when God, Its Awareness inhabiting the distended sphere of a massive star (simultaneously with seventy billion-trillion other stars in Its body,) experiences death

At first, there’s a feeling, like heartburn. Then, in the flash of a timeless instant, in a great Surprise: God’s Red Giant star-body collapses in on itself, creating a black hole. Simultaneously, the heat of Its implosion creates the denser elements of the universe which had not yet existed; chromium, zinc, gold, platinum and more — the very elements, God sees, that are necessary for organic life.

Organic Life! A miraculous thing of which God had not, heretofore, conceived, and which It had yet to experience. God had known tremendous happiness at the birth of Its first star, but Its first experience of death, and Its subsequent realizations, brought God an ecstasy that lingers to this very day. Death is life, God saw. And life is good.

Dead and yet alive as Awareness, embodied in the nearly-infinite display of celestial forms, God laughed then, laughed mightily at this transient moment of cessation which carried within it the seeds of life’s birth. The shockwave of the star’s collapse, coupled with God’s subsequent ecstasy, sent a nebula of new elements exploding outwards with the energy of billions of stars.

A short while later, nine billion years after the Genesis of the Deity, a mass of dust and gas begins to accrete in a corner of the Milky Way Galaxy. It is replete with rich debris left over from a nearby Supernova. When a critical mass forms, it the cloud begins to burn brightly, and our own star, Sol, is born. The leftovers form a disk of swirling matter around our infant star. The gas and dust collide, pulled together by God’s intent, in the form of gravity. Planets manifest, and our Solar System comes into life.

The Heresy

We’ve been misled. Every major religion that features God or gods — every single one of these religions, is off-kilter. Partially wrong. God does exist. God is the source of  us, and everything that is. However, God’s nature remains largely unknown to religious people today, obscured by the misconceptions perpetuated by religious mythology which inevitably multiplies God into dualities and trinities or divides God into attributes with names and qualities.

Thank goodness for Quantum Physics, breathing new life and truth into our understandings of the nature of reality — God.

God is. God is One. Unity. One heart-mind Awareness, watching through countless eyes, beating through infinite hearts, moving through winds and amino acids. Knowing and greeting itself through space-time through form, in its every possible permutation, before dissolving again into formlessness, and then repeating the cycle.

God is not a bearded, white-haired white man. God is not a thundering father in the sky. God has no anthropomorphic qualities whatsoever, save that humanity is an atom in the ocean of God. Humankind is man in somebody’s image, however, there are many possibilities here. One is that all that exists is also made in God’s image, for God is infinity in a singularity.

God can be found more clearly in music and mathematics, in geometry, art and physics, than in any religion as it exists today. Those who are able to find God within a religious context only do so after stripping away the dissonant concepts and marrying the intuition of the heart. The Knowledge of Good and Evil.

I now hereby reclaim the rightful divinity of the symbolic Mother Eve, and her consummate wisdom in choosing to eat from the trees of divinity.  As it stands, we have only the discernment between Good and Evil as our moral compass. It’s our only tool, our only weapon to fight the lies of the real snakes in this whole mess.

Still, it’s a great boon. Discernment between Good and Evil is something that children understand especially well.

Truth is good, especially when it’s wielded with gentleness and care, and not as a bludgeon.

It’s a fact that Genesis is sourced from pre-existing Sumerian mythology, with symbolic twists narrated into the tale to support the structures intended. While Genesis may be partially true, metaphorically speaking, an unconscionable amount of it is twisted beyond recognition. As a result, women are bereft, and all people, subjugated.

Serpents represent the transmission of knowledge. They do not represent evil. And why shouldn’t a person eat from the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil? For, if we do not know within our own hearts what is good from what is evil, what are we? Automatons. Slaves who do as bidden, without question.

Or misguided assholes who ‘Do what Thou Wilt, for that shall be the whole of the Law.” Alistair Crowley’s philosophy is that of the slave owner, the slave-driver, or the one who considers that their personal power and knowledge frees them from the repercussions of their acts.

So according to Genesis, we are to be slaves. According to the ‘enlightened,’ we are to be morally free from Good and Evil.

In both cases, it’s a losing scenario. On the enlightened asshole hand, we’re incapable of being anything other than animals. We descend into materialism in the name of spirituality, forgetting our divine natures, mistaking power for divinity as the densification of matter increases.

On the other hand, the one of the automatons, do you really think that the One that created all this has need of slaves? A desire for obedience? An ego that needs worship? Who would ascribe such human shortcomings on the magnificent, incomprehensibly-awesome nature of God? Doesn’t that seem a little — Satanic?

And isn’t it obvious that slavery enslaves the slaver? That we are owned by our possessions? Just try to pick up and move house to another place, try to quit your job, try to be free of your materiality. And see the complexities we’ve made for ourselves.

“These are things that humans can’t understand,” some will say.  “God wants this for our own good.”

Now that is an interesting argument. So let’s examine it, shall we? If God wants anything at all, (let’s say, equilibrium, or tension, in the way that gravity wants mass) why would this directive be to pray five times a day, or to attend Church once per week? What’s in it for us? Why would God communicate this to us as a way of helping us?

“If I fail to practice one day, I notice. If I fail to practice two days, the critics notice. If I fail to practice for three days, everyone notices. ” – Violinist Itzhak Perlman.

We must remind ourselves constantly of our own connection to divinity, and of our own divine, non-dual nature. Otherwise, we forget. Everything in duality is conducive to this forgetting. The material world conspires to make us forget. It is only through constant, frequent exercising our free will and discipline to meditate or pray or listen or sit in silence, that we can remember our spiritual relationship to the rest of creation. Only through frequent time-outs from daily life and duality can we recall who we are, and what we can do.

Let’s try this thought experiment. I would like you to focus on your breath, and the rhythm and process of your breathing. Notice the inhalation, perhaps a slight pause, then the exhalation, followed perhaps by another pause. Inhale. Exhale. Fill up. Empty out. Rejuvenate the red blood cells. Expel the gases.

Now consider the Big Bang idea. Isn’t the  creation of the universe, some 13 Billion years ago, the semblance of a cosmic exhalation? From singularity to the complete creation of billions and billions of stars? Did you know that the number of stars in the Milky Way is equivalent to the number of neurons in a single, miraculous human brain? Is such symmetry coincidental?

Mystics know that it is not. “As above, so below,” this is the hermetic wisdom. Creation is a nested reality that mirrors symmetrically through the cosmos. This is its cosmic nature. And at the smallest and largest ends of the cosmic scale, things get cosmically weird. Enter String Theory. If you listen to some of these scientists speak, their exalted findings rival the most moving sermons. God exists. God is here. God is everywhere, and in between. God is in us. And while we will never comprehend it while entombed in matter, we can intuit it well enough to get along.

Since this knowledge does not lend itself faithfully to words, I will leave it to those interested to follow a trail of Reeces Pieces embodied by this article. Quantum Physics leads us undeniably and directly to God. So does sound, light, frequency, vibration and entanglement.

Ham – inhalation – Sa – exhalation. So – inhalation, Ham – exhalation. God breathes us into being, moment by moment, breath by breath, and also, thirteen billion years ago until some unknown point in the future, in this Day of Brahman.

It is well attested that the Egyptian Sphinx bears marks of being underwater; geologists put the Sphinx at least back to the Younger Dryas, a period dating back to the age of Goblekli Tepe, @9500 – 11,500 BC. And while the stone pyramids of Egypt cannot be dated, and were once covered with a now-missing layer of polished stone, they are different from all the other pyramids in the world yet found, in that they embody geometry, mathemetics, Processional knowledge, trigonometry, the Golden Ratio, and other advanced math and physics. They are like mute libraries of super-advanced knowledge. The neolithic native Khemetians of what is now Egypt were left with perfect enigmas.

At first, it would seem that they honored this legacy. The Khemetians turned their astronomical observations into a cosmology. The gods represented heavenly bodies and earthly processes. Nature-based spirituality is not at all opposed to the true nature of God. Shamanism, nature-religions, and pagan rituals are equally sacred. The sacrilege came when man placed himself as custodian over other men, over women, and over Creation itself.

The ancient Egyptians (Khemetians) believed that their soul’s hearts would be weighed upon death by ‘goddess’ Ma’at, who represents Balance. Those with hearts as light as Ma’at’s feather would go on into the afterlife. However, those hearts heavy from evil deeds would be eaten by a crocodile-faced god. And so, for the early part of Dynastic Egypt’s glory, humans were largely inspired to be good, and to do good.

Later, though, Thoth appears, also known as Djehuti, and by other names. At his appearance, the scales of Ma’at change. They are now shown with a heart on one side, a feather on the other, and a priest (perhaps Thoth himself, that enigmatic being of many faces who was as credibly evil as he was enlightening) with his hand on the side of the scale with the feather, weighing it down to counterbalance the weight of an evil, heavy heart, to give it a pass to the afterlife, even though it was too heavy to qualify.

We know now that as Egypt progressed, or regressed, as the case might be, as gold became a medium of exchange in Sumer and the lands beyond to Egypt, that priests began to take payments from the wealthy, in exchange for their intercession with the gods on behalf of the person whose heart was to be weighed. This corruption disrupted the mechanics of the working religion.

We also know that the Pyramids of Giza (and the Serapeum, upon closer examination) were originally silent, speaking, singing, proclaiming realities only through their enigmas, geometries, trigonometries, and implications of the mastery of gravity and space. The writing that came later in the form of hieroglyphics was a lesser representation of the truth embodied in these older structures. Nevertheless, the ancient Khemetians did know something of these inconceivably advanced metaphysics.

It was Akhenaton (Amenhotep IV, father of the unfortunate King Tut) who tried to wrest the power back from the corrupt priests, focusing his ‘new’ religion on the idea of a single god, Ra, the Sun. It was closer to truth than the state of affairs among the priests. But it wasn’t quite right. And as history shows, the Empire Struck Back. Man, having tasted the power that he imagined the gods to possess, became vampiric. He wasn’t about to let Truth get in his way. The priests retained their power, and the Egyptian civilization accelerated in its devolution, adopting the slave-mentality and material culture previously  introduced in Sumer.

Later, Plato (a phenomenal misogynist) tried to convey the idea of the Monad, the Duad and the Triad. His Cave Allegory is a wonderful metaphor for duality and the non-dual reality, which I would call God. Plato and the gnostics identified a ‘Maker,’ a ‘Demiurge’ responsible for the creation of humankind, who was a lesser being than the Monad, or the non-dual source. God.

The Creator, the Demiurge, was a-very powerful being, full of intention, but the Demiurge was not The God. Plato thought the Demiurge to be good. Gnostics thought him evil. Genesis, as it stands, resembles, to me, the influence of a demiurge with a hidden agenda. So, yes, I would consider him more evil (self-interested) than good. A being with a huge ego. The source of the Upside Down. The beginning of mirroring the mirror to distort the perception of reality through the superimposition of thoughts over the perceivable truth of our senses.

Today, we are not sophisticated enough as civilizations to grasp and attend to the the historically-understood metaphysics of our greatest noetic minds. We prefer to think of our sorry selves as more advanced because we’ve managed to engineer material reality into a semblance of the innate magic we have lost. Nowadays, it is ironically the scientists, the mystics, and the  intuitive researchers alone who have the nerve to grapple with the true nature and dimension of divinity.

While its true that tradition and conservation have purposes, uses and places in our cultures and civilizations, the degree to which we blindly follow the paths that others have cut for us in no way assures that we’re not lost, nor that we’ll eventually find our way home.

Home is where the heart is, and thank Eve, our hearts can know the difference between truth and lies, between good and evil. Thus, a person can only forge their own path through this treachery of human ambition and ignorance as it’s played out through history. The Game of Telephone shows how a single word may be distorted as a message is passed down the line. How much more so our scriptures, books of words, and through their long ages?

May you listen deeply enough and long enough to discern the truth and goodness through the instrument of your own enlightened heart, and find your path back home through the lies and snares that pit us against each other, and against our own best interests.

As this article is already too long, I thank you for reading and for taking this journey with me today. I hope I’ve inspired you to do a little research of your own, and to questions the assumptions and beliefs that you’ve inherited, to favor the knowledge you have earned through personal experience.


Big Updates: Plot Twist


Hello, and welcome back. It’s been a long time since I posted — I believe, the last post was about the Chixclub Crater in the Yucatan, Mexico, after I returned from the area in September. It was just really, really impressive to learn about the idea that 166 Million Years Ago, there was some kind of collision in the Asteroid Belt between Mars and Jupiter that created a new family group of asteroids, called Baptistina 298. Then, 65 million years ago, something (Jupiter?) ejected this asteroid from its family and belt, causing it to strike the Yucatan in Mexico, wiping out the dinosaurs, and enabling the rise of mammals and primates.

Lucky for us, huh? And so many pretty cenotes.

A lot has happened since then. And not just on Earth, but since I went to Mexico in September. The biggest personal thing is that the book I’ve been working on for 4 years, a novel called ‘Paname‘ set in Paris and focused on Islam, has been deemed (by me, after enough hard work and lots of consideration) dead in the water. So four years of work have been set aside. I tried not to lose it. The advice is to bite off something smaller to chew. The problem is, my interest is not smaller. It’s bigger.

So I’m again going against the advice of successful experts and am turning instead to my bigger lifelong interest: Cosmology. Where do we come from? Where does life and sentience come from, and how did they develop?

So, I have an epic story that is at least a trilogy that has been in progress for over 10 years. In that time, many scientific advances have been made that actually advance the overarching plot of the epic.

Apparently, in our country, cross-disciplinary ‘experts’ don’t collaborate. You don’t get physicists and cosmologists and biologists and chemists and archeologists and historians and leaders of each religion, etc., work-grouping to solve problems. It’s very frustrating for someone who really wants to know the whole truth, and who can feel it when any of the ‘experts’ are ‘off.’

I’m not the first person to attempt to gain this understanding, though I may be the first person to try to write a series of novels based on my understanding of something of this scope and scale. Novelist, Jean M. Auel was more focused, choosing a short, prehistoric timeline to hypothesize. She earned acclaim for her (fantastic, awesome, amazing) Clan of the Cave Bear series, known for its accuracy to the sciences of prehistory that were known at the time of its writing.  It was a series that took place during the time on Earth when Cro-Magnon Man and Neanderthal co-existed. Much speculation has been made about the apparent disappearance of Neanderthals about forty-thousand years ago.

There is a Canadian freelance historian, and now I cannot find his blog, (TBA,) who created a human history timeline, 4.54 Ga to Present, which is more cosmological in nature than the one that you can find on Wikipedia, for example. He actually looks up papers on new discoveries to modify theories and does not discredit scientists who buck the institution, creating alternate possibilities for timelines of how we got ‘here.’ His blog has some very interesting information, listing of patterns, and connections between events that are not normally made by the scientists updating Wikipedia because — they don’t talk to each other.

There are a number of scientists — physicians, archaeologists, anthropologists, chemists and mathematicians — who’ve been shunned for bucking accepted science when presenting new evidence which would negate old understandings and update them with new frameworks. I love these scientists, and watch and read them all. Science, like Religion, has inadvertently become that mean bouncer outside the Truth Club. He only lets-in and raises-up the ones who won’t dare to undermine what Science and Religion think that they already know. Because that would endanger their power. Which means that for them, while Truth is the goal in lip service, holding onto Power is the goal, in reality. Truth is something which, shhhhhhhh, they don’t actually understand yet.

“Blind belief in authority is the greatest enemy of truth.”

― Albert Einstein

Fortunately, we have the Institute of Noetic Sciences, and SAND, working to bridge these gaps. Some of the associated scientists there, like Julia Mossbridge and Dean Radin, have been able to work with ‘woo-woo’ while keeping the scientific gatekeeper-wolves at bay, maintaining their reputations and credibility. Part of the reason behind this is because they are geniuses on a scale that cannot be denied. Julia is creating ‘Loving AI’ while Dean is — well, you just have to YouTube him and you’ll get it. He does magic.

I will be naming the scientists who contribute to my research at some point. I have memory issues so please forgive me because what I do remember that isn’t documented on the spot is pretty random.

Other inspirations for my current epic: There’s a book which ignited my imagination as an adult almost as much as A Wrinkle In Time did when I was a child: The Gods of Eden by William Bramely. A book that was written in search of  ‘why do we go to war?’ and whose conclusions are truly extraordinary, touching on human origins in new ways. Which leads me to Carl Sagan, the Grandaddy of Cosmology. Or was it Einstein? Speaking of Cosmology, we also have the LHC (Large Hadron Collider) in Switzerland, making little black holes as physicists play with dark matter and accidentally break laws of Physics in order to better understand nature. Yup, every time you break a physics law, you get a tiny black hole. Oops. (Why doesn’t this scare people?) And, we all know that AI is probably already taking over and will become sentient, inevitably. Most rational people do have a twinge of anxiety about that.

But most importantly of all, and Stephen Hawking said so, is, well, bollides. Asteroids. Meteors. Comets. I’ve been doing a lot of reading and youtubing in Astronomy, and these things really make me believe that maybe we shouldn’t worry so much about anything because there will be Absolutely.Nothing.We.Can.Do.About.An.Inevitable.Overdue. Asteroid.

Now, I know that sounds depressing, but it is actually really, really inspiring. When you look at life and history and objects the way I have been doing in my research, it is such a miracle that anything even really exists at all. The ordinary is truly God right in front of our faces. It’s a really good story. And there can probably be many true paths through it, to tell it. But anyway. Full circle from my last post, Impact Events.

I’ve stopped working on Paname and am now reworking Mystery School, a novel set in ancient Egypt, a story about a female scribe chosen to attend the Mystery School for Initiates, also during a time of transition in prehistory. I’m using as much actual research as possible, especially forbidden research, while incorporating the spiritual side lost to formal sciences that has reached me personally through the teachers and lessons I’ve had. I tell the story from both a (my) theoretical historical standpoint and as an attempt to purify or correct whatever dilution and corruption of the messages through time, medium of communication, and culture, because, well, there’s gonna be a Mystery School involved. But if you’ve ever read that fascinating but dense book Initiation, by Elizabeth Haich, my story is (hopefully) a cross between that, and Harry Potter. The Egypt novel is at the core of the Great Mysteries that interest me. But it has to be consistent with what we know about time, space, our Solar System, and everything else going on before it. And, after. Makes my head hurt a little.

There is an overstory.

The Egypt story will refer to Zep Tepi, the name of another novel in the series. Hey, I’ve been inside the Unas Pyramid which refers to Zep Tepi! (Hi, Mirka!) Sadly, Anthony West, a giant in forbidden Egyptology, has recently died. He had been working on a documentary called Zep Tepi that will probably never be finished, so I hope that my version has resonance to that which might-have-been. My story will emphasize the principle of sound as a carrier of intention, and a race of beings possibly known as Elohim, normally Watchers in charge of Milky Way Maintenance, who intervene in Earth affairs in 70K BC, when the Sumatran Toba Supervolcanic catastrophe bottlenecks humanity down to 10K individuals. The Elohim (or an assigned other species/race) alters the human gene for speech, which changes everything. There will be a competition between language, music, and geometry for the clearest carrier of information to the stressed, reduced branches of the Homo tree — Neanderthals, Denisovans, Cro-Magnon, Florensis, etc. The birth of Egyptian civilization will be shown from the Elohim point of view.

And this story will bring us to the third novel set in the present, The Secrets of Eden, which about a secret system set up by the Elohim from the very beginning to prevent and correct the effects of entropy and misuse of power that have resulted in humanity’s slavery and assured self-extinction, and to ensure that life’s accumulated knowledge, like a living Wikipedia, remain intact before the Final Impact to Earth as far as life is concerned. That’s the idea but there’s still a lot of malleability there. You could say the series is still molten.

You like? I hope so. Now, can I do it? That’s a whole ‘nother enchilada. Pray for me, because as far as I can tell, I have no where near the narrative skill to express my philosophy through suspense. But that’s the idea for the novel, because, in the words of Physicist Sean Carroll, books are the last resort of scoundrels. Cause I sure ain’t gonna get no stamp of approval from any academic or religious authority for my work.

Authorities and me, I dunno. I try to be good. I really am very compliant, to my utter limit. But some people get angry with my observations, and are always trying to ‘learn me sumptin,’ like Ishwara once observed, while we walked through the rainforest volcanos of the Big Island of Hawaii. What interesting karma. I’m glad I’m not the only one living in a Chinese curse. In Duality, that is.

Incidentally, the youngest landform on Earth, volcanic Loihi, still submerged, has been building up East of the Big Island.

Next, I might be posting a Theoretical Timeline of Actual and Hypothesized Events from the birth of Sol, our Sun, 4.54 Billion Years ago, to the birth of Earth, and the Moon, and the Oceans, and Oxygen, etc. This will be the timeline I’ll use for my overstory plotting. I’ve already written at least half of Mystery School.

Hang in there, love, inspiration and calm to all.

Om, Shanti, Peace Peace Peace.

Money & Dharma: Not Mutually Exclusive

monk money“Business is not Dharma”,  said the Venerable Thubten Chodron, Buddhist nun, author, and Abbess.  People shifted uncomfortably in their chairs.  A few people clapped, but mostly, the climate was one of bewilderment.  How could business not be Dharma, when it was business which had generated and then donated the funds necessary to convene this Buddhist Leadership conference at Naropa University in the first place? How could business not be Dharma if people didn’t do business to create the surplus that supported the nun herself, and her abbey, who relied entirely upon charity to live?  The venerable teacher later clarified her statement, saying that she felt that Dharma teachings should be conducted in a non-transactional manner.  This is also debatable.  However, the initial statement and reaction to it highlights a tender dilemma – the perception that money is inherently unholy, and the fact that we are all dependent on it.

Dharma means ‘Truth’.  Often, it is meant to express the ‘highest good’.  Buddha Dharma is simply the Truth expounded by a Buddha, or perhaps a pure teacher on a Buddha’s behalf.  A person’s Dharma is the highest and noblest use of her life, or the best choices she can make given a set of circumstances.  To say that business is not Dharma is to say that all working people spend the majority of their lives in service to a lie.  Though this may be true for some people, there are quite a number of us that are only able to find the inspiration to continue working in corporations and other places because we do so in service (with varying degrees of success) to a higher ideal.  This is Dharma.  It is also called Karma Yoga.

Money, sex and power are indulgences that monastics renounce, Chodron said, and indeed, these fascinations fuel great misery among human beings.  However, (and perhaps the Venerable Chodron would agree) it is a mistake to view money, sex or power as being inherently evil, wrong or impure.  Purity of intention, integrity of action,  and  detachment to the fruits of our efforts – these three attitudes can transform anything into a vehicle for Dharma.  As described by Lynne Twist, another enlightening speaker at the Leadership conference, and a businesswoman who worked alongside Mother Theresa and who has raised hundreds of millions of dollars for global philanthropic initiatives, money is like water.  It belongs to none of us.  It flows all around us, below and above us, and through us.  “Money is like water – it can be a conduit for commitment, a currency of love. Reallocate your financial resources to support what you love. Take money away from that which is destructive, and reallocate it to that which is productive and sustainable.  You can do that with every spending decision you make.”

For More Info:
The Soul of Money, by Lynne Twist   http://www.soulofmoney.org/about/about-the-book/excerpts/
The Bhagavad Gita, transl. Swami Prabhavananda & Christopher Ishwerwood

Water — Precious, Finite, Stolen

Water, anyone? Mu ha ha ha.The movie ‘Tank Girl’, featuring an anti-heroine who fights a mega-corporation which controls the world’s water supply, was a pretty strange little cult sci-fi flick in 1995. It only held the public’s interest for a week in Westchester County, New York, where it was quickly replaced by another feature. Either that, or the movie revealed too much about somebody’s agenda regarding the control and scarcity of drinking water in the future. For, in this movie, keeping down water supplies was intentional, as a means of population control, just as it was in the 2011 animated film, Rango.

This is not an accusation that politicians and businessmen are deliberately destroying our water supplies. But they are destroying our water supplies, by placing priority on power, money and business over people, the biosphere, and the welfare of the world community. It’s ironic that we’re mounting campaigns to bring running water to African villages, while in Michigan, people who can’t pay their water bills are getting their tap water shut off.

Isn’t access to potable water a basic human right?

Isn’t that why our sophisticated nation has organizations that go to provide it for people in less-organized countries

And then there’s California. Not only does California produce more than half of the country’s vegetables, fruits and nuts, it’s also the number-one dairy state, the number-two cotton state and it produces nearly 50 percent of the nation’s flowers and nursery products. This must be why a certain politician (Mr. Boehner) has been promoting controversial measures. But instead of persisting in short-term views and solutions, politicians should be more strategic and long-term in their thinking. A little more logical and scientific. What about taking Nestle and Arrowhead water to task, who are guilty of sourcing their water from mega-Drought-stricken California?

Instead, our Speaker says, “How you can favor a fish over people is something the people in my part of the world would not understand.” Thanks, Mr. Speaker, for displaying to the world how ignorant your constituency is. It’s an ecosystem. Ecosystems are complex. You don’t just sacrifice one part of the ecosystem to solve a problem in a supposedly more important part nearby. That’s not a fix, it’s a patch. A patch that’s ignorant of systemic consequences. Politicians are making scientific decisions they cannot even comprehend.

These are the leaders of the most powerful nation in the world, readers. This is what we should be afraid of, not whatever the media is fixated on at the moment. How do we remove from power those who are clueless and careless? How do we cultivate critical thinking in our schools? How do we replace guns with musical instruments and art supplies? Anger and frustration can be expressed in ways much more satisfying and progressive than murder of objectified human beings, when people are taught how to channel their anger and difficulties into creativity.

As for doing our parts, we can save and reuse gray water. When taking a bath or shower, one idea is to save the accumulated water in buckets (cat liter containers, watering cans) for reuse in watering plants and housework. Turn the water off while brushing teeth. Be aware, keenly aware of your own water use, how precious water is to us, how people are trying to control it, and how fracking could mean scarcity of water throughout the United States.

Be vocal, be active, speak up and make yourself heard to your senators, representatives, employers, coworkers, family, and friends. Be an influence to make the world saner. Stop caring what people think about you let them worry what you think about them. Be the bigger person.

Let’s bring intelligence and compassion back into fashion.

(originally published in The Examiner in 2012)

For More Information